IUI #4

Sunday morning I went in to the emergency room for my ultrasound to see how big my follicles were. I had one follicle that looked really promising, that the tech told me was about 21, I assume she meant 21mm. She let the on call OB/GYN, Dr Givlar, know. Dr Givlar then called me and I headed into Now Care to get my HCG shot. When I got home I thought I better start testing for my LH surge and I got a positive. I had planned on having my IUI on Tuesday, I had even requested the day off. But my body had other plans. I called Dr. Gaarnas' nurse, Gina, on Monday morning and she scheduled my IUI for Monday at 1:15. When I went to work on Monday morning I was a little disappointed that I would have to rush to my appointment and rush back. I went to my supervisor, Lexi, and told her what was going on. She immediately told me she would see if she could get coverage so I could just take the day off and work on Tuesday instead. I was able to head home at about 10 am and I took a nap. Brian woke me up to go to my appointment and I felt so rested and relaxed. Nancy, the CNP, that did my IUI was so sweet and upbeat. She insisted that we were close enough to Valentine's Day so this time the IUI was going to work. As I laid on the exam table with my pelvis at a 20 degree angle, I prayed and hoped. After the appointment I went home an napped again. It is amazing how emotionally draining the IUI's are, not only are they a little painful, but hope rushes over me every time. I can't help but think this is it, we did it, but then I have to remind myself not to get to excited. I have learned to shut my self off in fear of disappointment, it doesn't work, I still feel extremely hurt and depressed when the pregnancy test is negative. I cling to the hope that someday, someday soon it will be positive and all of my hurt, sadness and pain will be worth it's weight in gold.