It's been a few weeks

Okay so it has been a few weeks since I blogged, but I have been super busy! Trip to see my sister, I had a terrible cold and I was trying to get pregnant. I am always trying to get pregnant!!
So last week when I had dizzy spells and I didn't have my normal premenstrual symptoms, I was convinced I was pregnant. I was ecstatic, over the moon. I kept telling Brian, "This is it, we're pregnant, we did it!" But no, another month down and another plain in place. Brian was unusually understanding. He gave me a giant hug & told me we would try harder this coming cycle. I think I was working so hard to convince myself because our friends were on the verge of giving birth to their son. I wanted to feel like we were going to be delivering our own child in 9 months and it would finally be us taking the baby home from the hospital. Nate & Kate had their beautiful son, David on Friday, March 13th. I am so happy for them, but as always my heart is broken a little for Brian & I . I have been home all day today due to my back being out and I have been watching daytime T.V., wow, they live in a dream world. I mean, I knew they did, but WOW!!! Then there are the commercials, you know the ones, they are totally geared for new moms/new parents. I am sitting on the couch, crying....CRYING! It makes me sad & mad all at the same time. But I have decided to take control. I have made appointments for both Brian & I, for our physicals for the adoption papers. I was hoping we could just forget the whole thing, because we were pregnant, but I guess I need to get the paperwork off. A friend told me that when she couldn't get pregnant with her second child her OB/GYN suggested she have her Thyroid checked, she did and she had a slight Thyroid condition. She began taking meds and she conceived her second child shortly afterward. So I specifically asked for a Thyroid test, I mean I had one a few years ago, but something could have changed. It is worth a try, right. I wish I could just take a break from thinking about getting pregnant, but my mind is constantly thinking about it! I need a mental vacation.